So this is going to be another post about writing. I suppose I have become self conscious about writing because I just don’t do it very much anymore. I feel like I can’t properly start this blog because it feels quite alien to me now to be sitting writing, it’s like:
“Ooh look at me, I’m writing!”
But I used to write all the time, as I may have mentioned in my last post. I went to a creative writing group at univerity and I said I’d never showed anyone my writing and I was called pretentious by another group member. I never went back to the group. I’d been writing since I was about 5 and I don’t see how I could have been pretentious at 5 (although in fact maybe I was….. )So I am still quite pissed off about that despite it being over 10 years ago now..
I can really relate to that quote above because it has just become much easier to read other people than to write myself. I don’t know if I could write something as good as my favourite books. In recent years I have started to wonder what the “point” of my writing was and I havn’t really written anything for ages. Also I have spent the last few years filling out job applications and so I would feel guilty if I wrote for fun, because I felt like it was time to put away childish things. If I wasn’t going to do this writing thing “seriously” maybe I shouldn’t do it.
It isn’t just this that stops me from writing, I am quite a lazy person, I would like to read philosophy books but it’s a lot easier to read novels. Another aspect of my laziness is to start something and then finish without fully forming all my ideas………
